Office Romance Problem: You're Love Life Eclipses Your Professional Life!
The Fix:
Shift – Communicate – Manage 1/3

Office Romance Problems Effects & Etiquette (DOs & DON’Ts)

Office Romance Problem: You’re Love Life Eclipses Your Professional Life!
The Fix: Shift – Communicate – Manage 1/3

This video answers the question: What can I do when my office romance becomes a distraction for others, namely my teammates and my boss?

Knowing what to do in this case, is important because it causes friction at the office, which is never good news, for your chances of landing that promotion and a raise, you so want.

This video, will show you the exact step-by-step action you need to take, to Fix this office romance BossProblem! So, let The Big Fix continue!

The Big Fix is the name of the second part of this Sex and the Workplace Deck. In the first part, we mapped, and deep-dived into, all the 7+1 office romance BossProblems. And here, we are fixing them, one by one. The Big Fix is a guided, detailed, goal-oriented, step-by-step, journey back, to restoring your eligibility, after your office romance has rendered you un-promotable, and un-pay-raise-able. Which this video is going to fix! [“Journey” is such an overused word these days, I hate using it, but here it is very appropriate, so…]

Today, we are fixing office romance BossProblem no. 2.: You Become a Distraction for Others.

In the original video, we’ve seen how you are a focal point at the office, but of the wrong kind: Not for some professional acumen, excellence, and achievements, but for your love life ; Exacerbated by the Grapevine you have propelled, through your suggestive rapport with Schmoopie, at the office. If you’ve missed that video, or if you’d like a reminder, check it out here, before watching this one. For everybody else: Let’s fix it, so that you can once again be eligible, for that promotion and pay raise, you so want! Stick around! It’ll be worth your time!

Let’s get straight to it. Today we are fixing office romance BossProblem no. 2.: You Become a Distraction for Others. The Fix here is: Shift – Communicate – Manage

So, three parts to this Fix. Each is built on the foundation of the previous one, so they need to be executed consecutively. I will thoroughly explain, each and every part of this Fix, and give you the exact step-by-step action you need to take, to best execute each them, to make you, once again, eligible, for that promotion and pay raise, you so want!

Part 1 of the Shift – Communicate – Manage Fix is: Shift Shift your attitude, in regards to what is private, and what is not, with your office romance.

What will hinder this part of the Fix?
Thinking your office romance is your private business, only.

What will help with this part of the Fix?
Realizing it is not, and understanding why.

So right off the bat, let’s see what is private, and get it out of the way. Needless to say, the intimate details of your office romance are, and always will be, your private business. That’s not the issue. Let’s see what is.

There are, actually, three separate, but intertwined, issues here [somehow, everything in the world is always divided into three-s] : So

no. I. Not only is your office romance not your private business exclusively, but it is actually everybody’s business, at the office. From your teammates to your boss, and, depending on the situation, sometimes even your clients and vendors, if you can believe it. And you should! Why? Because it affects them. And when something affects people, it is only natural, they will react, one way or another.

Which brings us to the second issue: People have that right to react, because the effect of your office romance is not only real, but is mostly negative! It interferes negatively with everybody’s day-to-day life at office, both professionally and inter-personally. Either overtly, or covertly (which is actually worse). So, of course they react, and of course their reaction is mostly on the negative side. We have detailed this whole messy situation, in the original video here.

And, finally, the third issue: The mere reaction of everybody at the office, to your budding relationship with your coworker, is not in and of itself “wrong”, or “mean”, or “reprehensible” – not in and of itself!

Why? Because, well, first of all, people have a right to form opinions about anything and everything, your office romance included. But, more specifically to the point, people have that right because your coworker love is imposed on them! It is you and Schmoopie, whom are putting your relationship in everybody’s face, not the other way around! So don’t you dare shift the blame to them! You are not the victim here. If anything, you are the victimizer. So, you need to, completely shift your attitude. Hence, the “Shift” in this Shift – Communicate – Manage Fix.

You do this Shift in three steps: [three-s again…]

Shift in your point of view
Shift your attitude
and Shift your behavior.

Let’s expand on that.

Shift in your point of view
From that of yours only (both you individually, and you two, as a couple), so from that of yours only to that of your teammates’ and boss’ point of view. The good news is, that you have already done this: This was the linchpin of our entire analysis, throughout the first part of this Deck, So, you have this step covered.

Now you can build on that, with the second step:

Shift your attitude
From perplexion at your teammates’ and boss’ less-than-enthusiastic reactions to your office romance (why are they so mean to us? What’s the big deal? Why can’t they just be happy for us?), to an understanding and an acknowledgment of why it is so (oh, that’s why! Now we get it! It’s because, from their point of view, everything we are, and do, as a couple, creates an awful lot of BossProblems. (7+1, to be exact…).

and now, the final touch: Step three
Shift your behavior
Use steps 1 and 2 as your guiding light, as to how to handle yourselves, as a couple, around the office. Namely, act consciously, to reduce any potential point of contention, that stems from having a relationship with a coworker.

How exactly? By implementing every Fix that is relevant to your specific situation, as being detailed in this second half of the Deck, named The Big Fix. If you do that, you will have, almost automatically, shifted everybody’s pet peeve about you, into an almost non-issue.

The beauty of it is that, instead of being oblivious and clueless, as you were before, you can now be proactive in shaping how everybody at the office is relating, and reacting, to you, as a couple. In other words, you get to be in control! Which is a game changer, for any ambitious professional, as you are. Plus, shifting your behavior, in all the many ways The Big Fix determines, will undo (unless for some extreme circumstances)… so shifting your behavior will undo the damage your office romance had to your chances, for that promotion and pay raise, you so want – which is exactly what this is all about!

o that was the Shift part of this Fix: Shift – Communicate – Manage. Shift your point of view, Shift your attitude, Shift your behavior.